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"Gimme the Commie Cut"
There Are No Bad Hair Days in North Korea

North Korea announced today that every man must get the same haircut as the supreme leader Kim Jong-un. The BBC has the story:

The state-sanctioned guidelines were introduced in the capital Pyongyang about two weeks ago, media reports say. It is now being rolled out across the country—although some people have reservations about getting the look.

“Our leader’s haircut is very particular, if you will,” one source tells Radio Free Asia. “It doesn’t always go with everyone since everyone has different face and head shapes.” Meanwhile, a North Korean now living in China says the look is actually unpopular at home because people think it resembles Chinese smugglers. “Until the mid-2000s, we called it the ‘Chinese smuggler haircut’,” the Korea Times reports.

North Korea continues to be both monstrous and absurd. Kim Jong-un won 100 percent of the votes in a recent election, with a 99.97 percent turn-out rate, government sources said.

The new law, which commands North Koreans to “trim [their] hair in accordance with the Socialist lifestyle,” is more of the same from the Kim family. This murderous clown holds millions in bondage. Now he even styles their hair.

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  • Fat_Man

    Reminds me of “Bananas” a Woody Allen film from back when he was funny. Woody is Fielding Melish, a nebbish from New York. Fielding loves Nancy (Louise Lasser), but she wants him to be a revolutionary hero. Woody joins Espitsito a South American rebel leader. Espisito takes over San Marcos and gives a speech:

    Esposito: From this day on, the official language of San Marcos will be Swedish. Silence! In addition to that, all citizens will be required to change their underwear every half-hour. Underwear will be worn on the outside so we can check. Furthermore, all children under 16 years old are now… 16 years old!

    Fielding Mellish: What’s the Spanish word for straitjacket?

  • Some Rabbit

    Well, that’s one way to keep people from making fun of your ridiculous hair style.

  • Gene

    There has been some follow-up reporting on this story that throws a lot of doubt onto it. But … it says everything you need to know about NK that this is exactly the kind of thing the NK government might actually do. And if it could be proven that they HAVE done it, no one would be surprised.

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