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Korean Media Wars
Executing Uncle Made Kim Fat

The famously round Kim Jong-un is getting a little rounder, South Korean news outlets reported today. One radio station speculated that the weight gain has been brought on by stress since he had his uncle executed a few months ago.

He has been gorging himself with food and drinking due to stress since Jang’s execution last year, according to the rumors, showing signs of depression and facial paralysis.

Stress and heart disease are possible causes:

Kim’s physicians noticed that he could not use his left arm freely and started losing his hair.

He has reportedly been undergoing treatment every Tuesday and Friday.

Recent photos of the Nork dictator show his chin and cheeks have “filled out more” and he has become “stouter.” The weight gain has also reportedly given him back problems: “He often supports his back with his hands, which may be due to his weight.”

The detailed South Korean reports on Kim’s weight and appearance are possibly in response to a few unkind remarks about South Korea’s president that recently appeared in North Korean media outlets. President Park, those stories said, was nothing more than an “old prostitute” and a “rabid dog” that had become “mentally deranged.” Those reports also had viciously racist words for President Obama.


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  • Gene

    Re the stress-induced weight gain: Is he stressed because he ordered the execution of his uncle, or because someone else did?

  • Fat_Man

    Maybe he is just a pig with no self control.

  • Bruce

    This would be funny if millions of people there weren’t malnourished and living under tyranny. Laughing at him kind of feels like laughing at Hitler jokes.

  • Peter Gauge

    Faster please.

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